Saturday, August 20, 2011

Came along way baby

Or have we gone back a little? I have been thinking...Been watching...I got a few topics I want to discuss...
Kids and stores...Does anyone really know the proper way to handle a tantrum in a store? Is it fair to the kid to be punished for habits we might have created? Like allowing them to have candy every time we check out or buying a toy some of the times before with no reason but to shut them up? Is it fair to other people to listen to our kids? Or should they just deal with it? Two sides with very good points,pros and cons.
I don't like people to listen to my kids but I also discipline the store BUT not to shut them up. Lost you didn't I. Its not my job as a mom to shut my kid up. Its my job to negotiate and find out why they are upset or throwing the tantrum. My job is to remain calm because theres WORSE situations to be in. If I got mad or stressed over a tantrum then what would happen if I got robbed or my car stolen,I'd die from the stress. I also don't pay attention to the people around me, I dont want to feed off their negativity or their judgment of how I am handling the situation.  If the tantrum does not stop or the misbehaving does not stop, removing them from the store is my go too thing. Thankfully I never started habits. The thing with my kids is wanting to walk and then running around the store. They have so much energy they see open space and run, so listening is my key to having them behave in the store. Something my kids should know already.  They never whine at the check out, they could care less about the toy isle...and they are fed before we go to the store so they don't ask for food..I have avoided half the normal reason for tantrums.  As we walk in we tell them that we will be quick so that it will then be back to kid time(which means the park or going outside at home). Now do I get mad when other peoples kids are screaming at the top of their lungs or crying? If they are a baby crying, I do a little because I feel like there is a reason so why are you not fixing whats upsetting him/her. Food,cold,hungry.... I always went even to the store prepared when they were infants/babies. Otherwise I just continue my shopping and MMOB(Mind my own business). They didn't plan to ruin a shopping trip, the devil did not put is in the same store to stress us out and to act silly by rolling our eyes or passing judgement on the parents. So I am not going too. Sometimes I wonder why parents do things but thats because I do things differently, I am not judging I am analyzing and figuring out other peoples ways. If I disagree then thats okay. Not everyone is alike.

Next has anyone seen the mom who was on Dr.Phil who gave her kid hot sauce and a cold shower for lying? She is now on trial for abuse. But someone brought up a good point,the kids who were more disciplined seemed to become better adults. Not sure I completely agree with that one but then there is another statement made saying that there are other worse ways that people go about disciplining. Spanking, Soap in the mouth, locked in room, Crazy things no one wants to even think about and no one seems to catch those people. Why? Because most think what they do is fine. She was reaching out for help saying she felt like she was an angry mom. Thats exactly what her family needed was for her to admit she is wrong and needs some guidance. Do I agree with what I saw on that video of her and her child? No. A child lying about something so small and getting such punishment is dumbfounding. I know people use TINY amounts of hot sauce for kids who spit,talk back,swear...bite... and I think personally its each parents choice. I talk things out before I take any measure. I talk talk talk the kids ears off. "What you did was bad" "That was not nice" "You don't see mommy biting anyone" Etc. The cold shower. I have no nice words to say about that. I do want kids to be a importance to society and not a menace. I don't want people paying for their jail cell. Do my kids need to be perfect when grown up,No. But I don't want people to fear them, cops to be hunting for them, I don't want them to be a menace to society. I want them to be respectful of their elders and people with disabilities. I want them to be accepting of cultures,religions,races,sexual preferences, styles...so on. Will I discipline with time outs and stern looks to attempt to have my kids grow up to be something more then just a lump on a couch or a number in our jail system? Absolutely
I agree with things that were done back in the day. Parents in older generations had it correct. Crime was down. Respect was demanded. Kids thought with their imaginations. Kids were kids. Sticks and stones not Ipads and cellphones. I realize its hard to get that back today  but I can try with living in the country. Toys are not # 1...using resources, doing things for the planet..and much more come before tv and technology. I raised my kids to entertain themselves are car trips with toys and what they see out the window,songs, and basics. No dvd players in my car. I judge no one. My kids act different then others. Some parents need that dvd player to survive that 18 hr trip. =)

If you have not seen the show scared straight that is aired on A&E..It shows the types of kids and their thinking today. It teaches these kids that bad is not the only road to go down. It scares them into realizing that jail is not fun. That their attitudes with get them in trouble one day. I am one with an attitude but I watch where I have that attitude with todays ways. People will shoot you if you cut them off. People will shoot you for not giving them a job. People will shoot you for wearing the wrong socks it seems. I keep my attitude under wraps for the most part, I keep my voice heard but in a different manner then I would have 4 or 5 years ago. Things change and so have the people. Its sad.


Wednesday, August 3, 2011

Cleaning up

Few quick things. Last post was totally a rant and angry post. And even though no one reads these lol for my own peace of mind.
Most my anger is at my husband so bare with me.  He can be so perfect yet so not... Today=Perfect but you never know what tomorrow is in this relationship. Things still make me question things which makes the trust pretty low and since he will never come out and tell me they linger in my head which tends to make me a very cranky little person. =)
BUT for again my peace of mind in case anyone does read this. My neighbors that think they are better then me are not the ones who I live directly near. They are stuck up indirectly. One guy lives down the road a tad and when he walks hes always like checking out our yards and stuff..bugs me because I am a clean person living with a messy person so my front yard does not always look lovely.  I know hes this way because a friend of ours looked at one of his apartments and we were going to if they didn't want it but then they told us how he was and how pristine everything had to be and stuff. And we decided against it.
Then some crankiness comes from the garbage people... I NEVER almost NEVER insult a worker of any kind. So I follow rules quite well. I want to make peoples jobs easier and have them have a good day. So I try to clean up after a mess like one week something got into our garbage and I went right up and cleaned it all up well lately the garbage men have been mad about me not recycling... When I do. I have two bins full right now. It saves me money on bags and helps the environment. I even keep some jars and plastic containers to hold things or leftovers. I try to be resourceful so that my kids depend on their brains not technology and others. I'm a country girl. So even thought I thought they were being silly I re did my bags,cleaned up my trash cans even and marked them. They took the garbage but I just felt like a little kid. Like I had to defend myself to an older kid on the play ground. I'm also the only one who would like to listen to the mail man because again hes just trying to do his job and put the garbage on the other side opposite of the mail boxes..but since we have neighbors that share the driveway and I don't know if they agree-So we can't. I also like the curb to look nice...theres so much crap in the woods near the mailboxes...oy! Everyone around me seems messy,somedays I just give up and be messy too lol.
Another thing. Photography. I am in one of those stumps where you have a good day then a bad day with it. Where for a long time every picture I took was decent then you had the perfect shots. Lately I am lucky to get 1 photo on a bad day. And my good days are not even that fantastic. Arghh.
Then I have this issue with my left hand..its dry skin that spreads...yet its not dry skin just looks it because lotion does nothing...well now its turned so raw its got little paper cut like cuts on my fingers...HURTS. Think I remembered to by gloves for when I do the dishes? noooooo.
Such lame things bothering me yet they are. Can't change that but I also can't change things that can not be changed. But I can work at the things that can be changed.


My dad has jury duty...that has me a wreck,hes over 80,why??? Guess hes got it under control but sheesh.


My rings are not even close to being ready because they got shipped back by walmart because walmart forgot to add in the ups number or something else so now I must wait another 2 weeks....LOVELY!


Z's speech went well,she warmed up quickly.  We have a few things to work on so that it helps her progress even faster and better. 


Stefano spent the weekend at Joes moms. Having 1 child is way to easy. I didn't miss the fighting though.


Its been hot but not unbearably hot. Little rain here and there. My garden has two things in it that I have no idea what they are,I just know I planted veggies and flowers.


I have determined that silk sheets and me don't really get along lol. They keep making the comforter fall off.


Been doing freecycle a lot. Thinking of doing a tag sale in the middle of august.


Boring life I lead. Oh well. Gotta call drs about depo shot as I lost the card that tells me the next time I gotta go in. Ugh. I need to work on being a tad more organized at times. 


I just clean and run errands. =)
Heres a few pics.






Tootles.

Monday, August 1, 2011

Focus

Its funny to watch people be so fake. Act sincere when they are not...YET they have friends and a great life but if you ask them "They give up" SHOVE IT!!!!!!!!!!! Us who struggle want your life and your acting like a freaking baby!
You wanna know how my life goes?
I have no money
I never drive
I NEVER get me time EVER
Its only quiet after 10pm
I still have 30lbs to lose
I don't get to weight lift anymore
I deal with someone who has killed me as a person
I don't have a big back yard
No picket fence
No happiness.
Friends at a far
Neighbors who act better then me
People who are jealous of a hobby I have had LONGER then them
In laws that don't get it 
I rent a too small of a place


AND YET I still give rather then receive, still thankful.. SO GET A GRIP!
If your complaining about being single...TRUST ME its better that way
If your complaining about money but make more then most families....Go sit on it and see if that helps your mood!!!


As I type this seems to immature but you know what no one else is mature these days. Everyone else gets to act like a complete ass so why not me too!?
So much irritates me. I realize it shouldn't and I will slowly work on that but for now..AGHHHH!!!


One thing that is making me a crazy person is one person. One person who has changed drastically and I think for the worse. Thinks are out of character. Fights are over almost an imagination of what they think is going on or what they think they know. Little things are no longer little things. Its way to much. This person has started to think they can own everything and everyone like a piece of paper. Treat stuff like crap. Be selfish. And no one is telling them different except me. I can't even fully type out what is going on and whats going through my mind....its overwhelming and confusing. 


Just count your blessings. Stop holding out on good husbands. Stop dressing in t-shirts and mom jeans-remember to be that gorgeous in and out person. Never be jealous that someone else has the same hobby or passion.  Put the self conscious aside and glow. If you have a job love it like its your last day with a income. If you stand on your two feet most the time or all the time then be proud of that. If you make the right decisions,then adore the outcome. Your kids first ,yourself last. So many things,so many things that can go both ways. My kids are first but I try to look my age and adore my 23 yr old body haha. One day I will want it back so if you think I am gonna cover it up with a t-shirt your nuts!!! Stretch marks, I got em and mostly on my legs but IDC!
Love your animals, Don't think of them as a chore.
Make the best of what you have.
Be positive.
The things I am going to work on so that I can be better is-
Making the best of what I have-being resourceful 
Being independent-I can be..but ok I have always liked the company of a man...I have never been single for longer then a month BUT I also never really kept track because when I am single I am happy I don't worry about it but when I get with a guy I become putty lol I like a strong working man. (Which lately I don't have) I like a man who does the man stuff. A man who is not afraid to sweat. A man who showers at night to smell good for his woman. A man who can cook. A man who is a real man and does not complain.
A real man is honest and loyal.
Loyal to his job.
His kids.
His spouse.
His friends
His family.
A real man!
Sexy.
=)